How Trauma Enters and Leaves the Body

What Are Forms of Trauma?

When people ask me what trauma is, I tell them that there is “Trauma” and there is “trauma.” There is the big “T” incidents where a catastrophic event occurs like a flood, and there is the little...

How to Know You are Ready and Willing to ‘Have Kids’… or NOT!

This is not a piece about how hard it is to be a parent. This is about what comes before that. And when I say “having kids,” I mean being a main caretaker through marriage, adoption, birth, or otherwise. Her...

How to have a child-full (versus childless) life without having kids.

Being a Marriage and Family Therapist, random people have asked me if I have kids. I tell them, “Hundreds!” They look perplexed and inquisitive. I explain, “Through the decade-plus of teaching and be...

Top 10 Ways to Ruin Your Sex Life

Number one, Treat intercourse and orgasm as the key to enjoying sex. 

Number two, Shame yourself or shame your partner about masturbation. 

Number three, Treat fantasies like realities rather than a key to understanding a sy...

14 Ideas on How to REALLY Make Love

1. Making love= Sex+Presence+Embodiment+Openness+Curiosity+Intimacy

2. Share fantasies without expectations.

3. Allow sensation, pleasure, and desire be your guide.

4. Get curios and creative!

5. No one is solely responsib...

How to Stop Hating Dating in 3 Steps (with elaboration)

Step 1. Stop treating dating and finding a partner like a job.

In other words, stop seeing marriage and a partner like something you have to achieve in your life.

While watching a Disney film and leafing through...

I always say that when two people get married there are three things you need to consider. You, the other person, and the relationship you both create. A couple creates a relationships based on values, beliefs, feelings, desires, needs, and wants: all this is constantl...